12.29.2015

Vanuatu experience of my 20 month stay: photo collection, enjoy

I made a power point: 50 pictures (even though I hate power point) to show what my experience in Vanuatu looked like over the 20 months I served.

This shows all the highlights skipping past all the lows.

Wish I could have had more of the good times versus all of the bad times... but that is what makes the experience interesting I guess.




12.24.2015

Almost x-mas

Days are flying by can't wait until I move back into my condo and start living my life again on my own terms.

It's been okay and all returning home from Santo and ending my Peace Corps service but life in the USA for me tends to be pretty boring. Seems like the only real challenge in living in the states is the dating game. Doesn't seem all the interesting really. I wish I was building something, an art project or a school library something that has meaning. Guess I am just biding my time until I venture off again and find something meaningful to do. But first I have to stay put and dig my way out of the hole I dug living the poverty lifestyle of Vanuatu.

I wish there were more days back then that were highs versus lows, but the days when you can hop on a boat full of timber and work on a crazy build project on a remote island are not a normal way of life... those few glorious moments were definitely exciting. Wish I could have shown more friends those wild days but at least a few got to join me.

My brother is in town again for the holidays. It's nice seeing him again and goofing off like we did when we were kids. Hope these next couple weeks are enjoyable. And then after that I will be moving back into my condo... guess all is going fairly well.

12.18.2015

Mid-December

Finally feels like winter now and its only 28 degrees but the wind makes it feel 17 and it's going to get so much colder before it's over. I must be in Minnesota I am talking about the weather.

I had several strange dreams last night. One was about working at the Soap Factory but the layout of the building and the things we were doing were out of context of what volunteer work would entail there. We were (three of us) moving around scrap metal and there was one volunteer who was asking if he should take something like looked like a table? I tried to say no that seems ill advised but he did so anyway and soon thereafter he was met by some unpleasant looking fellows that attacked him for stealing the table. Not sure what that all means in terms of hidden meaning in dreams. Probably nothing.

Made me think for a while though... mostly about the recent board led meeting at the Soap Factory held on Dec 1st. I never got up in front of the crowd of 100+ people, to tell them my thoughts. Not sure anyone would care to hear what I would have said. I just listened. It seemed rather pointless to say anything really.

They presented the meeting as if its intent was to find solutions to its current problems. That notion is a farce. The board proceeded to spin a story about how and why they got to the place where they are now, broke and forced to shut the doors. Their story is two fold: Part one of the reason for closing, the director being a part time temp, means they failed to qualify for a large grant which was something they depended upon to function for the winter. Part two the: building costs related to the HVAC, bathroom construction and so on put them in the brink of defaulting on loans. That these extra costs came to them as a surprise being forced by the state to install the HVAC system and was only given a two month notice, that it needed to be done.

Both of these reasons are non-sense and attempts to save face for the board by blaming other people. The Soap Factory has been told by the state for decades it needed a HVAC... to say this came with only a few months notice is dishonest at best. Secondly the grant loss, that may have caused some financial disturbance but it was the boards poor decision to not search ASAP for a permanent director. Hiring a part time interim director was a foolish decision in general, let alone its impact on one grant.

What that meeting really was to me was the wake, and by this I mean as in:  a watch held over the body of a dead person prior to burial and sometimes accompanied by festivity. Instead of a dead person, the death was of the organization. Unfortunately this wake service was held six months to a year delayed because the Soap Factory (SF) as I knew it, was no longer in operation. Let me explain why I feel this way. As 2014 unfolded there was a mass exodus of leadership at the SF. The director left, the program manager Lillian transitioned to run the basement then left after that project, Mitch the building manager left as did Dani the volunteer coordinator and Tana the Deputy Director, gone. This vacuum of leadership could not be filled by anyone very easily, even though Colin (Building and Installation Manager) and Kate (Program Manager, Exhibitions) are terrific and did as much as humanly possible, it would have been nearly impossible to expect anyone to know the legacy of the 25 year old org and help navigate it without some senior leadership to guide them. This is why not having a passionate permanent director was devastating blow. Not being able to make strategic decisions to generate revenue, having a 16 hour a week leader basically, sunk the ship. Additionally in 2014 they decided to kill the volunteer program, a catastrophic error. Why? Because by removing the most passionate people from helping do work at the SF removed a core piece of the reason to be there. Those volunteers were the life blood of the SF. And killing that program drained them of life. It also was the source of much free labor that now had to be contracted out and paid for by a very small bank account. Having the hundreds of volunteers present and involved the SF community had additional benefits such as word of mouth for evens, gone... addition revenue from those passionate volunteer to attend events, gone. There are other impacts as well, such as volunteer contributing ideas, networking with other artists and other factors.

All that was left when I returned in 2015 was a building with heat and a haunted basement that was constructed by paid workman. Not nearly a shadow of what it was in 2013 when I left for my tour in the Peace Corps. All in all... I think things are pretty dire at the Soap Factory. The lack of leadership in the board of directors, and their Temp Director with now all staff laid off, how can things turn around? Who is willing to give an organization money knowing they have no one they should trust to give that money to spend? It is a very sad wish things were different but at least we had our wake.

11.30.2015

December 2015

Man it's Almost December now... the temps feel like winter now 29 degrees.

I don't really miss Vanuatu even though it is nice and warm there. I think it's because it's too warm like a sweaty armpit warm and no shower clean enough to enjoy washing the stink off in. But I would like to see Cuba. An island nation that like Vanuatu is in a time warm but there's is a 1950 semi Godfather like time warp. It sounds like a magical place at least for the short term until American's flood the place with money and turn it into a large gap, abercrombie, starbucks, apple everything looks the same hell that first world nations have become.

The holiday season is the worst time of the year... vapid commercialism, consumerism and it's mostly pointless except to drive the stock market up for the crash in January.

Hmm... I wonder how people are doing in g26 and g27. Those are the Peace Corps still serving in Vanuatu that I sort of knew. Not that they think much of how I am. But I am curious. Hope they are doing well.

My family has all been staying at my parents house over the Thanksgiving Holidays. My Bro his kid Mila and myself and the mom and dad. Lotta Bekkerus under one roof. It's been fun. Probably won't ever happen again. My parents are getting older, and Mark might not get a chance to do this again for years. But it was quite special and think everyone had a good time.

11.10.2015

November - New job and stuff

Oct-Nov

The weeks sort of fly by and I log less and less in the blog. I suppose when I was in Vanuatu there was so much more free time to write and getting back home means doing more stuff and less sitting on the computer writing. I strangely miss those moments but also I was frustrated then and writing more about the hardships than about fun times. I guess it was never a perfect fit for me being in Vanuatu but it was good to be out of my comfort zone for a while too.

When I got home I figured I would throw myself into building at the Soap Factory and being around my group of friends there but that did not come to be. Most had stopped coming as the volunteer program ended, the staff changed dramatically, and the new younger volunteer made the old crew feel less welcome. I think there were some there (Haunted Basement vols) that did not want me to steal their limelight (i'm not sure) and so I let them have their fun but it was their loss because I could have contributed a lot for free but oh well. Better to move on. I had fun working with Mitch building things and getting some money as well. But it is sad that the Soap Factory is closing its' doors as it is in the throws of trying to figure out its direction in so many ways. I hope that they will find a full time director, and staff that can restart the ways in which the old org inspired us so deeply.

The best thing that came to be recently is I got the job at Catholic Charities... and I never expected that. I signed up to help in a volunteer capacity and it turned into a job offer instead. How lucky can I be? The people there are really nice and the work is meaningful helping the less fortunate get out from a bad place. I like that aspect a great deal.

Experimenting with some reporting tools such as Tableau: https://public.tableau.com/profile/david.bekkerus#!/

Also reviewed some cool stuff from a tool I learned about from Nic Karr aka peace corps a reporting tool used to show how life expectancy and wealth per nation has changed over the last 100 years at:  http://www.gapminder.org/. A great tool but not available for personal use.

10.23.2015

House projects

Been working outdoor most of the last couple weeks helping Mitch fix up both his house, and Lillians.

I really like working with Mitch. He's been a lifesaver, and probably over the years he's been one of my best friends. Hope we can complete fixing up his 4 plex this week and help him sell that property.

Other than that... I am sometimes posting knee jerk reactions to my readjustment. Sorry if I come off harsh at times. I am just not always in the best of moods when I write on my blog.

Fall days

Things are strange when you first return home after being gone a while.

I think I expected everything to be like it was when I left for Vanuatu but things have changed, I have changed. I think I need to let that go, the season of fall is an ironic time to return symbolic of letting the old me, my way of thinking fade and start a new chapter.


10.20.2015

week 7-10: Time slipped

week 7   Sept 28-Oct 4 - slow week
week 8   Oct 5-11 - more of the same
week 9   Oct 12-18 - same same same...
week 10 Oct 19-25 blah... but i got to visit a friend in Eau Claire... that was fun.

The good news is that I think I am close to landing a job... that is the first step in my recovery process.

1) Job
2) car
3) home
4) live again

Lets hope that maybe someone will want to hangout with a returned peace corps vol in the near future ... betting that once I am working, have money, a car and a cool place... I am sure things will improve.

That is the funny thing about serving... you leave for a bit and most people forget about you, so you start over. Friendships in the USA a lot of them are not so deep. Lesson learned.

---

Woohoo... Landed the job. Soon I can start making my life matter again in the states.

9.29.2015

week 6 - American life

Sept 21-27

More of the same old same old... but getting closer to a job and stuff so that is good.

Watched some of the new rick and morty and a show called the house of cosby's pretty funny.


9.21.2015

Week 5 - Quick summary

Monday-Sunday (13-20)

Ever since being back having a blog seems mostly pointless... the only reason people read this was because I was in a funky place (Vanuatu) and working a strange job (Peace Corps) now I am just a bum back in the states.

What is interesting about hearing about my working on some small projects here and there? They are pretty common things. But maybe I should start a new one... life in the static state. Nothing seems very challenging here... wake up, eat, go outside and do stuff and go home. repeat... maybe once I start a new job and move back into my condo my social life will return but being away in the south pacific definitely had an impact. I saw a world that is fading from existence... one being impacted by global environmental change, social change and so on... maybe some for the better some for the worst. Nowhere is left that is untouched by western influence. But it was interesting seeing a place that was only softly impacted. It will be vastly different in 10 years, maybe completely different in 20... but such is life.

9.09.2015

week 4 - Replug into the matrix

(07) Monday

It was a mostly boring memorial day... took a few photos:


Loring park


Wrote a little on a short story... not sure it is any good or not might post it later.

I guess since returning from the Peace Corps, no one really gives a shit about my blog so it might be pointless to post anything.

(08) Tuesday

Going to build some shit today with my friend Mitch. Might rain but who cares.

(09) Wednesday

Slow day just biked around mostly.



Foods



Then back to the soap to help with lighting


(10) Thursday

Got out of the dog house but not sure I want back in now. Best to help people that want your help versus being made to feel a fool by foolish people.




(11) Friday

Helped Mitch building his shed but then the next door neighbor decided he did not like how close it was to his property line so we paused to consider how to move it.

Hung out with Lillian at some art opening.



(12) Saturday

Did a bit of BBQ with the fam and made some burgers. Tonight have a little get together with some friends.






Went to the heart of the beast and celebrated Kat's birthday...





(13) Sunday

I did pretty much nothing all day

9.01.2015

Week 3 - Fair days ahead

August (31) Monday

Went to the fair today and met up with Bryan and Kate:



 Looked at some flowers in the agg building


walked past the silly haunted house


Said hello to the KKK looking sheep in costumes


And then there were lamma's


Kate wanted a fried Olive


Princess K is looking butterlicious as always


End of days we're all getting tired

Lets call it a day friends... until the next time.

Sept (01) Tuesday


Doing some yard work at Mitch's place involves this monster tractor. Mitch was the lead builder at the Soap Factory for many years and a good friend of mine. I miss working with him on crazy projects but at least I get to help him build a shed at his house and another over at Lillians.


This is his family...


And here I am

(02) Wednesday

Working around the city and took a couple pictures



(03) Thursday

More building and making the haunted basement at the Soap Factory

(04) Friday

Building stuff with mitch:



(05) Saturday

Bloody bash prep work at the Soap Factory:



Hung out with the first cousins and uncle:





That is em... Hannah's little cutie.

(06) Sunday

Relaxing day... mostly slept all day... then I went to Rosedale first time in a long time. I got some new pants and a bike shirt, and some shoes.

You know being back is not exactly what I expected or whatever but it's not all bad. I am a bit disappointed with how somewhat slow things feel, I recall being active and wild when i lived here in the cities. But maybe that memory is of a different me, a person that used to think that was active and wild but now things seem pretty tame.

I wish there was something worth fighting for in MPLS that I could dedicate my time to... no idea what that would be though.

8.25.2015

Week 2 - readjusting to city life

(24) Monday



Biking home on my coda comp took one blurry photo of the city. Love biking again.

(25) Tuesday

Went to my storage locker to get ready to build stuff this week... thank god I had left plenty of old pants and shit i can ruin while not destroying new clothing.

Then I drove over to St. Paul walked around my old campus because I might take this temp job talking about my school... the University of St. Thomas and earn a bit of pocket change while I try to find a real job. Not really trying too hard to get back in the office just yet. I think need to readjust a bit more.

After all that I went to the Soap Factory Movie night and watch a Harry Potter flick a decent day.

(26) Wednesday

Being home means spending money, forgot how much it takes to live in the USA.

(27) Thursday

Haircut day... been looking forward to get a real haircut for ages.

(28) Friday

   Did not much some work at the soap factory but mostly a slow day

(29) Saturday

  Picked my parents up at the airport: first time i saw them face to face in 20 months.



(30) Sunday

  Did a little work at the soap factory but all in all a really slow day

8.18.2015

--------END OF SERVICE BACK IN THE USA------- week 1 - back to my hometown

(17) Monday

Did very little today... needed to catch up on some sleep.

Here is the last photo I took on Santo with Bryan and Kate. My two bests in the country.


So... tomorrow. No clue what to do... should have tried to get my bike fixed but sleep was nice.

2am

Can't sleep. I just watched some classic Richard Pryor comedy from the 70's his bits were dated but still strangely relevant. I remember when everything he said was a big controversy not anymore. His whole heroin bit was the thing that shocked the world back then.

Noon
Can't help but wonder what I should do with my time now that I am back. Being without a car makes it a bit harder.

11:59pm

So far things have been fairly slow going here. I forgot so much about what it means to live in the states... having money is what really matters most of the time since everything people want to do bleeds your bank account. Cash is what makes you a king here, without it you're nothing.

(19) Wednesday

1am
  First Rick and Morty Season two excellent. I will mess with time!

Went to the MIA and later played some chess with my Uncle:




(20) Thursday

Found my way over to St. Paul and spent some time with Mary:



(21) Friday

Went to MIA with Mary and had some coffee at the Boiler room.

(22) Saturday

 Not much to tell... went to Nye's going away party. But they are not even closing until January. But had some decent food and a drink then got a ride home from Preston. Fun night

(23) Sunday

Finally met up with Lilian and saw her new place. Congrat on the the new home

8.10.2015

Week 72 - so long and thanks for all the fish

(10) Monday

Four days until I am in the air flying home to Minneapolis. Can't wait to get back home.

Last time to watch the people out in my front yard making kava:


Medical clearance stuff to complete and a few last documents and then I just sit and wait for my flight. Hard to believe I finally get to go home been waiting/dreaming of this day since the day I landed January 28 or something 2014.



(11) Tuesday

Finishing up the COS paperwork process... now time to talk a little walk and look for some junk to give ppl back home.

Started the day with some lovely AMERICAN Breaky... and feeling great. 2.5 days left to air time.

(12) Wednesday

More Jill's breakfast and then my last medical review/clearance stuff. I only have a few more items to tick off then its paperwork finis.... woohoo. DOS description of service writing time. One page to describe all the awesome work I did. Going to be a challenge to limit it to just one page. Oh well.


Little random group of mostly new friends having some fun.


Few more:
Mr Nick... Super funny guy.


So cute as always ms. Sophie... we got matching tamtams statues...



Neil Burgess / Alpha Vanuatu : 5467276: neil.burgess@alpha.vu software guy... very cool.

(13) Thursday

Slept late today... finishing up my last bits of paperwork and then going to sleep early. I wake up and start flying tomorrow since I can't post anything much the next day I will pre-post my entry.

(14) Friday

so long Vanuatu...and thanks for all the fish


(15) Saturday

Full day of walking around Minneapolis. I got my phone turned back on. No luggage yet though
sob... but I am about to go to a friends wedding the reception bit at the Soap Factory and the party afterwards. Excited to see a bunch of Creeps as we like to call ourselves.

Photos to come tomorrow. Hope it is a fun night.


One of my bestest Amanda... love this lady. 


Dani freaked out when she saw me at the Soap... tossed her drink and hugged me. 

(16) Sunday

first night I finally got to sleep... but first go get my luggage.

The last wave of Vanuatu finally caught up with me.


Horse in the Bar... fun night.


The big mama's market in Port Vila.